HAPPY. What is this strange feeling??

It's been so long I didn't recognize the feeling at first!! The last time I was Happy with my life was when Jeremy built our teepee in Texas. Maybe 22 years ago? 

I'm happy with our New Home,  our New Life, our new Possibilities, EVERYTHING. 

And I Know I won't live much longer to enjoy this but that is part of the Joy. I will leave this life to the people I love. I will leave them SAFE. That is all I have prayed for❣️

I'm living an answered prayer and it is Wonderful! For years I have pondered how to make sure Jess and Jeremy never ended up homeless.  I did it,  grace of God.

Almost lost Jeanette!

This was way too close of a call! Yesterday Riley and Robbie called me, only said "We need you here right now!! Please! It's Mom"

I was already headed out the door before they said that. I went with Nett for cervical surgery 2 weeks ago. They said she was bleeding - I got there and she was hemorrhaging. It took a minute to get her to come with me. Robby had started to dial 911 but Nett told him to hang up. (He will Never not call again!) There was blood every where like someone had been murdered and dismembered. Nett kept trying to clean the mess, pretty much had to drag her out. Took her to Lakeside ER. The surgeon said that her surgery had opened and that an artery was pumping her blood out! She was bleeding out, already lost over 2 pints of blood before they got her into surgery. Terrifying!!! She is home now. Weak but Thank God Alive!!!! Last night I fell asleep saying "Oh my God I ALMOST LOST JEANETTE!" Over and over. 

I prayed over her in the ER. One of those rare prayers that I KNEW I was heard and she was covered in a white protecting light. 

Thank You God and Jesus our Savior ❣️

Is there another shoe?

It feels so foreign.  I feel Happy. Like content. I'm still waiting for the other show to drop. I'm still me.  I thought the plumbing was The Shoe. Figured that out for now.  Thought it was th AC. Figured that out for now.  It still could be one or both of us losing SSI, but will figure that out, too, if it happens.

We Have A Home. After the first of next month when Jenise and Phillip get their place we will ALL actually be in good homes with Real Hope. 

We still have troubles. We have 5 teenagers in crisis to get to adulthood.  Jami is going to the methadone clinic but still seeing Watson and doing meth, being tough to live with.  But overall, Huge Improvement for the Ketterman/Laughary household. 

Jessalynn and Brandon Graduate College

So unbelievably proud of our Jessalynn Fitzgerald and Brandon Fisher❣️  Jeremy, Jasmine, Jessica,  Jenise,  Phillip and I went to their graduation from UNL today. It feels so privileged to just know them, be a part a their lives!!  It was so exciting to be there and to think of their lives leading to this moment. They still in high-school when we met Brandon but he very quickly became family even as Jlynn was sure that Brandon was going to hate Jeremy like she did.  Surprise! They drew our family closet coming for "Game Night" every week until they left for college.

I've known Jessalynn since the day she was born. OMG adorable! I didn't see her much her first couple of years because I was in Texas with Mom, but when I first brought Jeremy to Omaha Jessalynn was 2 and totally stole my heart. We were staying at a hotel with a king size bed and Pat set her on the bed across from where I was standing and as he apologized for how shy she was she rolled across the bed towards me landing with her head in my lap gigglings.

 

FOOTNOTE: NOT!!!

I call BULLSHIT. 

3419 Curtis Avenue

I'm starting to realize that I feel secure and happy.  Two things I've seldom felt and maybe I've never felt both together. 

It's peaceful here, too. Sitting on the deck hearing insects and a couple of dogs barking. A car going my by. No yelling. No loud music or voices. A sky full of stars inside the ring of towering trees around us. 

Home.