This Home

 Sometimes I can't believe this is my house.  Our house. We own it and it is Wonderful. I can't feel it a lot of the time like when I think of Jeanette's situation. Then I feel something like guilt.  And Jeremy doesn't seem to feel anything about owning this house. This Home. But it is truly wonderful! No more worries about being homeless or how my girls and grandchildren will survive after I'm gone.  They have a home.  

Sometimes it feels like it's not real,  like I'm trespassing here and then I realize it's our home and I feel something like Awe.

We have a home.

Parotidectomy

 I had my surgery on the 16th and spent one night in the hospital.  It's the 23rd now and the incision is infected,  started antibiotics yesterday and feel better today. This has been a gruesome recovery!! I never want to do anything like this again! The pain has been unbelievable but I think a lot of that is because it got infected.  The drain was removed on the 23rd, that was fun! and it is leaking now because it's infected. Pretty gross!

I really wish I hadn't scheduled the surgery when school was starting - that made everything a lot harder.  It feels like I've been on the run ever since I got out of surgery. No rest. 

I gotta quiet about this somewhere. 

Jami was arrested and Dave and I went to her hearing right after my surgery so I had that drain tube coming out of the side of my neck.  We were sitting in the waiting area outside the court room and everyone was trying to not state at my drain tube full of blood.  Dave started craving jokes,  I wish I could remember them!! All about how every one was wishing they had a sexy drain tube like mine. I couldn't stop laughing because he wouldn't do popping off with different jokes about it.  He was just amazing.  I was still in treatung pain and scared we wouldn't get Jami out of jail but for that time waiting for court I felt no pain or worry. And then we went in and won Jami's freedom and sitting behind her with my sexy drain tube definitely helped her case!!!! 

Thank you Dave❣️

Jeremy the Father

 I just saw a collection of paintings by a Ukranian artist known as Soosh about fatherhood and was so very touched that every one of them made me think of Jeremy with the grandkids growing up, especially when they were little. He does suck with older kids but I don't think he yet receives any of the credit he is due for his early care from the kids and definitely not from me and the other adults in our family.  I feel ashamed of that and will start correcting that thinking right now. Maybe I can figure out how to copy and paste those paintings here.

See the tiny tea cup?

Every one of these bring back a memory of Jeremy with the kids. The paintings are of a father daughter relationship but I see the boys in some of them, too. 

Worlds of Fun

 Jeremy and I took Jasmine,  Kira, Shy and Riley to WOF and 2 of Kiras friends met us there and no one took a single picture or bought a souvenir!! The kids say they had a good time but I'm not sure. Jeremy was stingy with spending money and just Not Into It or something which kept me on edge the whole time afraid he would say/do mean/wrong things. It's always like that but felt amplified on "vacation". 

We stayed at a nice Best Western right across the street. The hotel was nice but we really should have got 3 rooms. I thought 2 kids could room with us but only Riley could stand the odor and, being the only boy he really didn't have a choice.  

I had really stressed about leaving Jess alone but she LOVED having us gone! until the last night when a huge storm hit Omaha knocking out the power. Morr than 200,000 homes were without power! She heard a tornado coming but was scared to take Nova in the basement with Katana down there!! I found out she would rather die with Nova than face Katana in the basement!! Fortunately the tornado missed them but we definitely need a Plan B there.