A Good Deed Day

I lost my wallet a couple of days ago and this evening a man and a little girl knocked on the door and returned my wallet. They ahd found it in a parking lot on Saddlecreek, Visa still intact. I gave them $20 that they looked like they could use for being so very honest and making my day so good. :-)
We took the car to get it fixed today and it wouldn't make that noise no matter what we did so the guy couldn't find anything wrong with it. We drove it all over Omaha and Council Bluffs and it didn't make a sound from the front end.

Jessica the Hero

The car is in terrible shape, something about the front end, and we were stressing over how to pay for it when Jessica offered to sell her Neon to pay to fix our car. :-) We just sold her car for $180. and that should pay most of the repair on the Honda. It is a wonderful feeling to have one of my girls come through like this in our time of need.

Wednesday Morning

I seem to have been marked here as a soft touch. I get people coming offering to shovel the steps for two dollars all the time and I just had one who only wanted a sandwich when I didn't have two dollars. Made me sad to have someone that hungry at my door. Especially the day after Christmas when everyone is still sick from overeating at Christmas Dinner.

Christmas Night

Christmas went well. Jeanette and Rob and Jenise and Robbie came and we had a nice dinner. Poor Jeremy was very sick all day but still worked his butt off helping with everything.
Now it is over and Jessalynn is going to sleep on the couch because her bed is piled with gifts. :-)
One very nice thing was I got an email from Uncle Paul for Christmas that made my day perfect.
I'd better get to bed now. Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!

Christmas Eve

We woke this morning to Jessalynn joining us because she was scared and had another ear ache. I will be taking her to the ER a little later after I go to have a cat scan of my sinuses at ten. Jami needs to go to the ER, too, today because she thinks she is having a miscarriage.
Other than all of that, it is Christmas Eve and Jessalynn is excited. She will spend this evening with her Grandma Linda and then spend the night with Daddy and come home tomorrow morning to open her presents here.
Mikey and the girls called last night and we got to talk for a while. The girls were pretty quick but I talked to Mikey for a while. I sure miss all of them and it is good to talk to them when they call.
We got one Christmas card from Kenny and Robin this year. I have some things I plan to take over there later.
Jami got a phone finally so I can call here whenever I want.
It is going to be a good Christmas in spite of everything!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What a SUCK day!

Still reeling from the wreck last night and Premier First called and said that Marianna fired Jeremy. We had to go turn in his time card for this week and Premier said that they will have another job for him starting on Jamuary first but we will have a tough tough time still with this. Jeremy called One Source Staffing and will be trying to go out and work for them for th next two days and whatever they have after that until the other job comes through but One Source only pays seven dollars an hour and we were barely making it with him making eight fifty. Plus One source won't be full time.
I have no clue what we are going to do or how we are going to survive and we have the ticket I got last night and the insurance deductable to deal with, too. Life is really sucking BUT it could be worse. Jeremy checked the car this morning and found out I didn't damage the radiator. It was the windshield washer fluid running out last night not the radiator water so the car still drives, we just have no pee boys or a left blinker.

Car Wreck

I wrecked the car last night and it was my fault. I got flustered hearing sirens and couldn't tell where they were coming from and I was too tired to be driving and I started to turn left when another car decided to go. I swear it seemed like he was trying to get hit but what ever it ends up my fault. His car is damaged pretty badly but our car hopefully only has a radiator leak. The headlight there even works although the blinker does not. I managed to drive it home after the police got through but can't drive it any more until it is fixed. The guy was Laotian and spoke no English but I could tell he will try to sue for all he can.

Wednesday Morning

Jessalynn is much better today. She likely would have been OK to go to school today but I wanted to be sure and she said she wanted to stay home another day which sealed it. We'll try tomorrow.
The landlady came while I was taking Jeremy to work last night and Jess said she was very angry about the rent but I just talked to her and she has calmed down but wants her money. I'm going to have to do two delay deposits today to get the rent but hopefully we'll get caught up someday...

Tuesday Morning

It's a bit of a busy morning. I took Jami to her appointment for orientation for General Assistance at Work Force Development this morning and Jess and I are going to the Salvation Army for Toys For Tots to get Jessalynn some Christmas Presents at ten. Then I pick up Jami at eleven and I have an appointment with Kim Camp at eleven thirty. I likely am babysitting for Jeanette today but I will call and see if Michelle can fill in since I have Jessalynn home from school today. She is better but still a bit peaked and had a fever last night again.

Jessalynn Sick :-(

Jessalynn has been fighting a bug for a while but yesterday morning she woke screaming her ear hurt so I took her to the ER. Her fever was 100 when I left home and almost 103 by the time I got here there. She was very good for the doctor and nurses and agreed to take her medicines so she wouldn't have to get a shot and I brought her home. We fought that temp all day and night but she is better this morning finally. But she had to miss school and lost her perfect attendance record.
When Jeremy and I tried to take her to the hospital the car wouldn't start so Jeremy gave it a push to get it started and we rolled down the hill and pop started it. I parked by the ramp at the hospital just in case and the battery was still completely dead so we had to pop start it again to get out of there. I dropped off Jessalynn's meds and we went and bought a battery while they were getting them filled. Jeremy asked them to test the alternator, too, but their machine was down so I just hope it was only the battery.
Jeanette paid me back the little bit of money she has owed me for a while and I told her not to worry about the rest for now. They are having trouble and I don't want to be like my mother and divide a family over money ever.
Kirk is another matter. Knowing what they did to my meds gives me fuel for the fire I hope to light under him but it could be to no avail. If he refuses he refuses and I will have to drag him to court and still likely won't get paid back. What is really stupid is that he is likely going to refuse to pay me because I am out of favor with him because I wouldn't give him a pill the other day. More amazing and disgusting is that he had the nerve to ask.
I still haven't confronted Kirk and Jami about what they did to my meds last month, taking some out of each capsule, but I have decided I am going to even though I expect them to vehemently deny it. I KNOW. You can't open a full capsule without some spilling out and I checked every one I got back form them and they were all about three quarters full if that.

Winter Rambling

It's nine degres but supposed to warm up to 34 degrees today. I'm already thinking thirty is very warm. A good thing since I seem to be stuck here in Nebraska for some tome. I can't imagine being away from my girls and their children except Jami's, who I have no choice but to be away from.
We've had a lot of snow and ice and now there will likely be more ice with this warm up. I no longer think at all about moving back to Texas ever but maybe someday I'll end up in Florida like other old people. The cold is definitely hard on me but it isn't as bad as I thought it would be so far.

No Payback

I am beginning to really understand that Rob and Kirk are likely never going to pa me back the money they have borrowed from me. It has been two years for Rob and six months for Kirk and both seem to think it is not necessary to pay me. And there is nothing I can do about it! I hate this feeling.

Blues

Jami got to me tonight. She called several times today wanting rescued and I went and got her when I took Jeremy to work and she told a tale of barely surviving and near madness that is terrible and frightening. They have no food and no heat. Their apartment is supposed to be heat paid but they only turn on the ancient steam heat for a short period each day and they are freezing the rest of the time. They paid their rent and electric bill and paid for Kirk's rides and a few other people he owed bits here and there to and then paid a couple twenty dollars for what was supposed to be forty dollars of food stamps and there was no money on the people's food stamp card they gave them. I can't take it. We are so broke yet I am going to buy them a space heater tomorrow and some food. I just can't not do it and I will just have to find a way to make up the money so Jeremy doesn't suffer for it. Jami is also talking crazy about running away and has been drinking today to try to get warm. Drugs aren't an issue because there is no money for them. She is in worse shape mentally than I have seen her since right after she lost the girls. I can't take it. Have to do something, everything I can to make a difference. Friday she has her appointment with General Assistance and then she will qualify for medical help as well as get help with the rent and electric and I am going to try to sign her up for food stamps tomorrow. Whatever I can do without hurting Jeremy.

CarGo

We drove the car hotwired for a bit until we could get the part and John down the street put it on for forty dollars. Now, I just hope that is the last glitch for a while although I know the front end will need some work eventually.
That missed night of work is going to hurt us but nothing we can do but get through the best we can.
Jessica got a job today finally and is happy once again. :-) It's at a pizza place, bartending I think, and she goes in Tomorrow to meet with the guy.
Jessalynn is over at Jeanette's for a playday.

Car Down

Boo hoo. The ignition switch went out on my car and it won't start so Jeremy missed work last night. He and a neighbor are out looking at it but I don't have any idea what they are doing. If they could just hotwire it I could get to the parts store and buy a new one.
Lots of snow down and more to come tomorrow. Fun fun fun!

Mall Massacre

Yesterday afternoon a young man went into the mall and opened fire on people shopping killing eight and wounding five before he shot and killed himself. He left a note saying he did it to go out with a bang and be famous. Omaha is in shock and there are all kinds of prayer services being held around town.

Colonoscopy Prep

The title says it all for the procedure. Yuk. I did manage to keep down half of the Golytely and Dr. Hay's nurse said it was enough.
Otherwise I had a rare pleasant day at home. I took Jessalynn to school and stopped at the bank and came home and piddled around the house all day and it was really nice. :-)
I've dropped my new friend, Laurie Lemmons. I do feel sorry for her but she is so lost and I've known for a while that she is listening to lies about me from her son and I don't need to defend myself to her or anyone. Truthfully, she has been more of a burden than a pleasure, so needy and nearly psychotic. I didn't desert her; she wanted to be dropped. She couldn't take our connection through her junkie son and I have always been surprised she wanted to strike up a friendship to begin with considering how I feel about Rizzo. I wish her the best and hope she gets real help someday.
Kirk has found a ride home from work which makes my life about 80% more pleasant not having to get out at eleven every night and pick him up. Now I can go to bed at a reasonable time for someone who gets up at five thirty.
I didn't see Jami today but I did schedule a dentist appointment for her tomorrow at one. She will have to go to the hospital with me to make that appointment so I hope she stayed home tonight and didn't get stranded in C.B.!

Quit Smoking

Today is my day to quit smoking. I have patches and I am smoking my last cigarettes and writing now before I dive into a smoke free life. I think I will succeed since I have so many reasons to succeed the biggest one being all those I effect with second hand smoke. After that comes the fact that I never told Lindsey I started again and I hate to let her down. Then comes my own health and the fact that I have a sinus infection that I have been fighting for over a month now and I am on my third run of antibiotics. Also, I would like to see if my singing voice comes back at all when I quit. Lastly I am hating smelling like a stinky cigarette all of the time!!!!!
Relations are a bit rough with Kirk and me right now. I am getting fed up with taking care of them when they make enough money to take care of themselves if he didn't spend first monies on drugs all of the time. The other night they asked for a ride to the casino to cash in a seven dollar coupon to buy cigarettes and stuff and the money went to dope instead which really pissed me off. I'm not driving him anywhere that gives him access to buying drugs again. The night I took them to the casino I had to stop at Kenny's and he got it there from someone.
We had an ice storm over the weekend and I tried to go pick up Jeremy in it and got stuck about two blocks from here and had to walk home slipping and sliding. I have been in terrible pain ever since and even went to the Emmanuel ER last night for a shot which gave me a little relief for a little while. I may have to go back today and try to get some pills, too.
That is another problem I'm having dealing with Kirk. The other day I couldn't find my Morphine. I searched and searched and Jami was asleep but woke up and freaked when she found out I'd lost them because she was sure she would be blamed. I didn't suspect her but I was wondering about Kirk because I hd given him a ride that day. Jami called Robin and got her to give me a couple of pills to stop the withdrawals that were already starting and the pain and we gave up the search. I picked Kirk up from work and we told him what had happened and he just mumbled that I probably misplaced them . I dropped them off and came home and Jami had called and left a message that Kirk had had my pills in his back pack but hadn't admitted it when we told him about losing them. She said to come get them. I got them in the morning and the count was right but I suspect the amount in each capsule has been tampered with because they aren't full nad they aren't working too well. I have diarrhea indicating I am in slight withdrawal still, too. Kirk says he wanted to just hide them in my room to find so I wouldn't think bad of him but I just don't get that he didn't tell me he had them when he heard about the frantic search plus I still don't know how they got in his bag from my purse to begin with!! It all sounds fishy. I think that when he told Jami about them he was hoping she would want to keep them and not tell me . What else can I think?? She says he told her about them as soon as I drove off and then they fought all night about it because she was mad he would be so disrespectful to me. I finally told her that I don't think he is doing any good for her and just making her suffer all of the time in poverty she doesn't have to live in.
Jeremy and I and everyone are getting along good again and I have a new slogan, Don't ride the clutch and don't ride Jeremy. I get so bad about lecturing him like he is a kid when he screws up and I have to stop. He works about sixty hours a week lately and needs all of the support he can get. Poor guy. He is working so hard but there is no money for any kind of luxuries yet because we are in the hole some and trying to get enough money to move, too. He wants desperately to make enough to buy me a ring but I don't think we will be able to by Christmas like he wants.
It's a little snowy right now but supposed to be clear of snow and ice for most of the next two weeks.