After I'm gone

 Still a major stress.  I want this house in Jess and Jeanette's names but if I do it before I die I have to pay property taxes.  I do believe it will take both of them to maintain this house.  They will have almost $4000 a year in taxes and insurance plus upkeep. 

I should turn the basement into an apartment for Nett and the boys ASAP but I have Dave here at least until he gets his hernia surgery (which technically he should have already done!) and then have to figure out firing them in with Jami here if she doesn't figure things out.  I know she doesn't want to be here with the "rules" , doubt she followed them still.  Her plan was to get committed and then they file her disability and get her housing but I don't know how realistic that is or if she even really wants to do it.  She believes she can get SSI for her bipolar but I'm not sure about that any more.  Plus I wonder how it might count against her that I was filling for her when she left the hospital AMA after her coma.  So Dumb.  Her thing for Mike and Meth has screwed her life so badly!! 

So,  figure out how to leave this house.  I hope they will provide Jami shelter when needed,  I believe they will,  but no guarantees after I'm gone!! I'm not even sure they will share with each other! And then there are the grandchildren.  I don't Jessalynn will ever need it,  God because I would burn it down before I wanted Brandon in here,  but there are the other kids.  I hope they can all find shelter here when needed but always temporary while Jess and Nett live. I believe Jenise and Phillip will figure it all out and be able to survive with their little (Maybe big?) family and they have his family to fall back on, too. Robby should find his way,  too. Riley could struggle.  I think he will either struggle some or make it Big,  he could go either way.  I was sure that Jazz and Jess were headed for college after high school and headed for good lives but the way they have struggled with high school has me doubting that.  Jazz will have some back up from Lamar's family but Kira won't really have anything like that.  She will get social security until she is 19 or as long as she stays in school after I'm gone.  Again,  depending on this administrations plans for social security! Surely that program is safe???? 

I wish I had planned longer and better for them all.  I REALLY never expected to live much past 50, old age is such a huge surprise!!! 

I only have $20000 life insurance because I started it so late. Lamar started one for Jazz and Shy at the time but he says he let it lapse so mine might have to help all of them???  It was for Jeremy to finish raising Kira when I started it.  Now he is gone and she is almost raised.  Most of it should go to the girls to maintain this house but if Jess gets on SSI getting $20000 could mess that up.  I know Kira still believes it is all for her.  I'll have to explain that eventually.  

The good old days when you just waited for your girls to "make a good marriage" and be taken care of!! Did that ever actually exist?? Now we have equality (gone too far?) and I have started a mariachal society in this family!! 

This is a mess.  I guess I can't die for a while! but the superstitious part of me is terrified to say that!  

What will happen to my family???